Speaking your mind without fear of the consequences
“You feel psychologically safe when you can say everything you need to say without having to worry about the consequences,” explains Patrick Graman. As a communication trainer at Radboud in’to Languages, he teaches people about psychological safety and the communication skills required to achieve it. “This might involve, for example, speaking to a colleague who is taking up too much time during a meeting. But it also means having the courage to admit a mistake without fear of being ridiculed or losing people’s respect.”
That doesn’t mean, however, that everyone should be able to say whatever they like. “That might actually lead to the exact opposite of a psychologically safe situation,” says Patrick. “Always take a moment to ask yourself: what does me saying this actually add? And not just for yourself, but also for the other person and for anyone else involved.”
Different perspectives
It’s also good to be aware that everyone sees the world through a different lens. “You can’t assume that everyone shares the same norms and values as you. And what you consider ‘normal’ may not be so for someone else.”
For example, someone who always says exactly what they think may see this as being open and transparent and expect the same from their colleagues. But for people who are used to communicating in a gentler, more subtle way, this can come across as too direct and feel uncomfortable. Conversely, the more indirect way of communicating may, in turn, seem too vague to the first colleague. This can lead to frustration on both sides.
It is precisely in situations like these that it is important for people to remain open to dialogue with one another. “If that works, even in uncomfortable situations, then there is psychological safety. The important thing is that, despite the differences, you remain connected to the other person.”
Three key elements: connecting, opening up and daring
So how do you achieve that psychological safety? “In our training courses, we identify three key elements that are required for this,” explains Patrick. “It starts with connecting. It’s important to really listen to someone, without expressing your own opinion or judgement. When we practise this in the course, I often hear participants say that they found it a relief to talk to someone who didn’t seem to have any preconceived ideas on the subject.”
The next step is opening up. “This means being open to other people’s ideas, but also daring to open up and show your vulnerability. An important part of this is asking for and giving feedback.” And the final step? Daring. It takes courage to set your boundaries or to bring up difficult topics.
During our training sessions, we come across a lot of cases that many people can relate to. To give another example: a participant recently shared that, during a difficult period in his personal life, colleagues took over some of his work to lighten his load. The whole team was very understanding. But when he later returned to work full-time, he was disappointed: certain tasks were now routinely assigned to a colleague, whilst he would have liked to do them himself again. But how do you bring something like that up without coming across as ungrateful?
From individual skills to organisational culture
The situation described above shows that even when there is already a very collegial atmosphere, it can still be difficult to speak up. Patrick therefore emphasises the importance of striving to achieve psychological safety as widely as possible within an organisation. This helps to create a shared foundation for uncomfortable conversations that employees might otherwise avoid.
Connecting, opening up and daring to speak out then become not just individual skills, but part of the way people interact with one another within the organisation. “You make psychological safety part of your corporate culture in this way, because everyone recognises what it is all about and understands the underlying importance of it. A team that experiences psychological safety shares more ideas, collaborates more effectively, and feels more like a team.”